Monthly Article Archives: February 2001

Further Reflections on ConnectionsRobert Brooks, Ph.D.

Many readers e-mailed me in response to last month’’s newsletter “Reflections on Connections.” Some shared their experiences in which someone engaged in what I called “a seemingly small gesture” to help them feel special and appreciated. Others recounted with much satisfaction their own efforts to overcome a “praise deficit” by becoming more aware of the many opportunities that exist to communicate appreciation towards relatives, friends, and colleagues at work. I was very touched by these accounts. In my clinical work and seminars I have heard many individuals describe their regrets at not having truly acknowledged and thanked someone who played an important role in their lives, whether it be a parent, a coach, a teacher, a friend, a co-worker. Sadly, in some instances that person is no longer alive so that the opportunity to offer thanks to rectify the oversight is no longer possible. I have also heard many stories in which people found a few moments to demonstrate their appreciation and the impact it had on both parties. People seem eager to share with me the joy of these seemingly small gestures. For example, one man who attended one of my parenting seminars told me before he left, “When

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